I'm faced with the facts
And a fist full of threats
I stand quite amused
At the end of the bed
I have no defense
For what I have said
As a handful of love
Whacks me right round the head
She's growling and stalking
And grabs from a pile
A book that she throws
And it missed by a mile
I'm holding a pillow
And as naked as sin
I'm backed to a corner
With a wastepaper bin
Then up on the mattress
There's no place to go
I'm guilty yes guilty
But there's no place like home I rewind the hours
To see what went wrong
I plead for forgiveness
And I'm hit like a gong
It seems that I'm guilty
Of smiling too long
When recalling lovers
That now are long gone
I'm guilty you¡¯re guilty
So let me be stoned
The past is the present
When there's no place like home
Off with the shoes
And a whack round the head
Your ear rings like a phone
Some explanation
Might patch and mend
A love that's lost control
Now there's no place like home